Stop it!

By Emily Mumford on April 7, 2015 in Emily's Personal Blog
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After discovering the freedom of “Stop it!”  I have had enough space to notice something else…

When I think,  I mostly do it in the form of a sort of conversation – with the perfect friend – a friend who listens attentively, finds everything I have to say riveting and never needs to talk about themselves – just loves hearing all about ME … endlessly…

The thing is… that this means… now that I am clear enough to notice… that I spent HOURS a day talking to this “friend” inside my head,  and what do I say to her?

I tell her all about things that have happened to me and what I think about them – but the thing is they are always OLD things, things in the past – and my thoughts about them are always things I have thought before that I am just rehashing, regurgitating for the ever attentive ears of my “friend in my head”…

 

So let me make this clear … I am talking (in my head) about something that happened often YEARS ago that I know ALL about – to someone WHO DOESN’T EXIST…

 

And I do this ENDLESSLY … and it makes me feel rubbish, it exhausts me and robs me of spontaneity and joy….

And while I am doing this I don’t notice what is happening NOW… I am not here, not present… I am blathering on about stuff that has nothing to do with who I am today and what is happening now… and my audience for this never ending rehashing of “Life According to Emily” is a figment of my imagination…

Sounds like time to “Stop it!”  : )

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Emily MumfordView all posts by Emily Mumford